More Teeth!

While staying at Gran's we discovered Sam has another tooth! A 6th one, beside the top two teeth. YAY!

Some Glitch That is..

Ok I've had enough and I'm all done with it. this is what happened and I'm glad it's over. For one, the mastitis is healed. This is how I found out. Wednesday morning I woke up with severe vomiting and diarrhea. Wayne and I figured it was a reaction from the new antibiotics so he suggested I make an appointment if I don't feel better later on. When he left for work I got worse all morning and managed to see the doctor at noon. I got a neighbour to come over to look after Sam and I managed to drive myself to the doctor. I didn't even know but I had a high fever and he told me I had a bad stomach flu and that the mastitis has cleared up. The flu symptoms I was experiencing the past few days were really flu symptoms. SO he sent me home with some instructions to drink Gastrolyte packages and Pepto. Wayne came home and his mom called saying she wanted Sam and I to stay with her so I could rest and Sam could be taken care of . Thank you mom!! She saved the day that's for sure. It sure is hard to be sick with a baby and when your husband can't take the day off. We got back home last night and I'm not 100% but the worst is over thank GOD and I'm taking it easy. Now I've got a bad head cold out of it all and I've gone through 3 Kleenex boxes. It's 20 degrees outside and I'm planning to sit on the porch with Sam today, as it's as much as I can do. I'd LOVE to go for a walk very soon!!

Glitch

I've been 'away' lately, trying to deal with this mastitis still. It turns out the antibiotics weren't working as fast as we hoped so I'm on a wider spectrum for the next 10 days or so. Lets hope I feel better very soon, I'm sick of being sick. I've been flu-ish on and off for 2 weeks now! I've called in to work tomorrow just to get extra rest. Everyone at work is quite sick so I think I have caught a bit of a cold on top of it, but with this infection I haven't got it quite as bad. I got double whammied...can't wait until it's all over. I've lost 5lbs already. It's spring time and the snow is almost gone, I can't wait to get out and get some exercise, my heart rate up and some yoga...! Sam has been doing well though....same old cutie patutie! HEE HEE

Lunch Date and Basket Balls

Today Sam came downtown with me for errands and we did lunch for the first time together near Parliament Hill. What a beautiful city we live in.....so much history! After all these years I STILL feel like a tourist. I don't drive down there enough, but this summer that's going to change. I LOVE the Market.
She slept 12 hours last night except to wake up at 4am because her feet were like ice and also to feed, but she went back to sleep, so I don't really count that...she doesn't usually feed in the night anymore unless she's teething. She napped twice today and was barely interested in food except for some of my lasagna at lunch.
We had to do some shopping on the way home. Since we've been playing at Gymboree these days, I've noticed Sam really loves playing in the pails full of balls. I decided to buy a big plastic baby blue pail with rope handles and fill them with balls. The beach balls aren't out yet so I bought one "Sammy Size" purple basket ball to start with from the sports section. When we got home she was beaming ear to ear! She even danced....of course because that's another favorite thing of hers.

Divine Intervention

Thank you to my mother in law Pat for taking care of Sam today while I worked this morning. Sam had a great time as usual and loved her new Elmo Dr./patient doll she bought for her!
I later took a trip for new pillows. Time replace ours which have been giving us HUGE headaches and kinks!! After a day of work and running to the store I felt so run down again I couldn't imagine getting through making dinner. I found left overs from last night in the fridge and Wayne took the Mustang in for our new red Ford truck , we'll get to that later. Managed to dish up for Sam and we all settled for dinner when Sam was almost falling asleep and trying to crawl across my lap to nurse....so I let her but didn't know she'd go right to sleep and at this point I knew it would be for the night. She still had her day clothing on so I didn't bother with her jammies and just put her into her crib. It was 6:30 and now it's 10:33....I've got a lot done in that time and had some down time with some soft spa music and some thoughts with myself. It was what I called Divine Intervention for sure.
So the truck...it's a 2006 4x4 extended cab. That's my version. This is what it really is.... Ford F150 FX4 Super Crew (4 door). While heating up dinner, Wayne wrapped Sam up in his coat and we went out and sat in the big new truck...nice and spacious! And so practical for Sam....and I can actually drive it as it's an automatic! Wayne can haul his lumber in the summer for his wood projects, it's great!! I didn't think I'd be so happy about a truck but it's nice. Sam likes to dance to the music inside. I think she approves of the surround sound.
Before I wrap it up, here's my response I tried to post today to a couple of comments that didn't go through....(refer to the last post for this and thank you for checking in you guys!)
I'm having issues with the beans I had for dinner so I better go before I blow a hole in this blog...

Beth - WOW you had it TWICE, poor you! I couldn't imagine going through this again. I feel chilled all the time so I'm quite bundled up these days. Thank you for the little hints Beth! I'll be using some warm compresses if that will speed it up! It's good to hear from you!

Trace - Hey Poppit! Thanks for poppin' in! lol! I'm so glad you'refeeling much better, I read your blog but hadn't had time to comment. Mmmm ice cream for Twig LOL! I'm your sounding board whenever you need. This time can be bumpy even though it is the best time of the year for you. Glad to know you've got an action planned! Will talk to you very soon, Salem Store has a spring sale we need to get there fast!

Another Tooth and other Sammy Stuff

Sam finally has another tooth, beside the two bottoms on the left. I discovered it when I caught her chewing on something she wasn't supposed to and checked inside to see if she had cut herself. She somehow managed to remove the glass from one of my photo album covers - mmm yum, glass...no blood but a big white tooth! Explains her night waking, face rash, runny nose and lack of appetite lately. Poor thing...she's drooling excessively and at night she chokes and coughs so badly. I think from this big delay in theething, we're going to now see a whole whack of them at once!
Another thing that surprised Wayne and I tonight was her first 'word' besides daddy...I guess you can say it's more of an exclamation. When playing with daddy after dinner, daddy clapped at her and said YAY! as we always have, and she SAID very clearly while clapping back at him, YAY!! I was on the phone at the time so I was trying to keep from the distraction, but I just heard my daughter say something! THEN she did it again! Right after! She likes to mimic now, especially daddy. He'll stick his tongue out to the side and gnaw on it making funny noises and she'll do the same thing back at him. Around the corner from another room if she makes a loud and abrupt "AHH!" I say it back and she'll do it back and forth at me and we get into quite a giggle session. Then I'll come around the corner to chase her and she'll sream and crawl away quickly ... laughing her head off. It's hysterical!!

As for mommy, the infection I'm fighting is nasty. I didn't realize an infection can be so hard on a person. I've been feeling REALLY fluish for days! Even on my third to forth day on antibiotics. Today was the first day I felt fine. I got a call from a playgroup friend to join a Gymboree outting and I couldn't turn it down. I've been feeling so guilty for keeping Sam inside for so long (and I too have been going stir crazy). I went out and by the time I got back, Wayne arrived from Toronto and I was feeling pretty aweful again. So I guess I'll just have to take it easy and wait it out until the infection gets better before I go running everywhere like I do. But you should have seen Sam at Gymboree (and it was so busy today too), she was so excited with so much going on and so many kids around she was screaming in delight!! It was hilarious. She's so adorable and she's mine. Hee hee!

Continual Coping

Wayne left this morning for Toronto and Sam of course chose not to have one single nap all day long and she JUST went to sleep a half hour ago. So this is my break for the first time in a whole 12 hours and I go to sleep in a half hour anyway. Just hope she sleeps through the night, as Wayne usually gets up with her twice in the night....I'm not going to be happy. AND to top things off...Sam could be weaning herself, from a few signs I got today...all she did was play around. This is something I do not want to deal with right now. I have way too much on my plate, thank you very mashed potate!!! I need to just learn how to cope with things one at a time here. Weaning is a process too, not to mention an emotional one I hear.
So the surprise Wayne came home with the other day...a microwave! Our other one always made a 'ba-zip ba-zap' with sparks flying inside which never failed to startle me right into next week, not to mention Max dropping food out of his mouth while running from his food dish. Never bothered Wayne a bit, but he'd tease me everytime. It always made me wonder what it could be doing to our food too.
Anyway wayne's home again Tuesday night so I'm looking forward to it already! Good night everyone, have a nice week.

Recovering

So I went to the doctor and he confirmed what I suspected was Mastitis. He's now got me on a heavy course of antibiotics for 2 weeks. I went to work today even though I wasn't feeling the greatest. We'll be spending a nice quiet evening in tonight, watching our A&E channel we normally like to view Saturdays. Wayne just stepped out for a 'surprise'....who knows what that is, but I know we've already planned chinese take-out. Stay tuned....
Thank you guys also for popping in and out to keep up to date on things and for your support in my ups and downs this week. I'm so glad to have you all!

St. Pat's and other Jazz...

Happy St. Paddy's Day! Ihad to say that before I update you on things. I've never been big on this day, it's just been another day really...dress in green or if you don't you get pinched...or whatever. The day really wasn't ever important. Then I moved out here....9 years ago and couldn't believe how freaked out people were about this day! Everywhere! On the news, in the paper, on the internet, everwhere you go people are dressed up in accessories or drinking green beer and ads are placed at the road side to join them for a big party on the 17th....I never remembered anyone back home making such a huge deal of it. Is it just an eastern thing? or was it always going on but not quite so elaborate and I never really noticed? It's kind of a fun tradition though I guess, now that I've married into a very STRONG Irish family....I'm 'forced' to celebrate - lol with a glass of Guinness and some kind of Irish dish or whatever's on the menu, at least the family's together in lieu of the event.

So today I seem to be feeling better again....strange but I'm glad. For the past few days I've felt fluish, maybe it was the bug and it was a 24-48 hour thingy but whatever I'm still seeing the doctor today to get it all straightened out. I have to take care of what I think is a bit of an infection I have going on in my right breast - aka mastitis, a blocked milk duct which is very painful and could require antibiotics depending. BUT my OHIP has expired a month ago and of course this is what happens when one procrastinates so I have to drive all the way downtown and stand in line and all that jazz and be back in time for my appointment early this afternoon. I'm so glad Wayne's home now....he's only going to Toronto until Tuesday night and will be home for a week and a half after that. I'm quite relieved. I got that call back from the doctor on Wednesday and he said my symptoms weren't anything to do with the new meds I was on and even though I said I was finished with them, I decided later to continue with them. He knows what he's doing and so I'll keep on going. I think I've got all of this sorted out. Thanks much you guys for your comments it's so nice to have outter contact and great friends. Have a great weekend and will keep ya'll posted.

WHAT is HAPPENING??

Just when I thought I was out of the woods. I was starting to feel so good and yesterday was such a great day! Then BAM! I'm so sick of feeling sick. Now I'm really sick today and even had to call into work, which I haven't done in 4 years. It's been a nightmare since 2:30am. What woke me up was intense pounding rapid heartbeats. Then I felt extremely thirsty so I turned on the light looking for water which was empty. So I got out of bed, feeling really weak and chilled right to the bone - I couldn't stop trembling. I got my water, took a sip and on my way back to bed felt a wave of nausea come over me. The heart pounding kept on and all I could do to cope with all of this was to take deep breaths and lay back down. I kept the light on until I calmed down. As soon as I'd move I would feel sick again, but I was so thirsty I needed more water. I finally got up and threw up. This went on until 4:30 and I expected Sam to wake any minute to feed. Lucky she didn't until 5:30 - I got to lay there until then. I was so scared all night and had no one to call. I wondered at first if it was just an anxiety attack but I realized it was definitely more than that. Then I remembered the medical information sheet I had for my new meds were beside my bed so I read the side effects - had some, didn't have some, it didn't tell me much. I called the doctor today to get some info, he will call me back. I waited to call wayne winnipeg time at 6:30 (eesh sorry Mister) he usually knows the answer. it's hard when I'm alone and especially when I have to take care of Sam when my in such a physical state! I called into work and Wayne's mom came over anyway, as she was up quite early to beat traffic, etc. (sorry mom) I just feel so bad about everything! And I don't know what the heck this is all about - if I've just caught a bug or if it's the meds or what! I'm just so tired of trying to figure it all out! I just want to feel normal again. So I'm not taking the medication anymore. And I'm not looking forward to Wayne leaving to Toronto on Sunday. I can't do this anymore.

Back in the game

I seem to be feeling better today. I'm easing into the day in a positive state of mind and generally happy. The vertigo is almost gone too. I think I'm heading back in the game!
I wanted to take Sam to Gymboree this afternoon but she napped late so I'm getting some chores done and out of the way before I get back to work tomorrow. I'll also do some groceries before Tracy comes over this evening for a bit of scrapbooking. I got a title page done last night - Sam's album is coming along nicely!
Right now I'm just listening to Dean Martin's "Essential" cd - it's so nice just me, Max and Dino, he really lifts the spirits these days!! Great to scrapbook to also.
I got another email from my cousin's wife whose brother's back in the hospital and back on antiviral meds and painkillers for the previous encephalitis he went through a couple of weeks ago. Please pray he'll be ok and for a successful recovery. The family's been through so much too! Thank you.
Life's so precious. It makes me feel so ridiculous blogging about all of my nonsense.

Scrapbook Day

Today was a nice day to scrapbook with Tracy, not to mention a beautiful day to walk out into, at a balmy 13 degrees!! The day started out a little rocky, trying to get out the door and dealing with crap (myself) all morning again, (which I won't get into, but from the past few posts I'm sure you get it). Anyway, Tracy's such a breath of fresh air, with great energy around her. She had the sounds of 'the spa' from digital tv on in the background which was such a "get away" for me, as Wayne stayed with sam and I got caught up with some really overdue scrapbooking pages I've been dying to catch up on! Wayne's off to Winnipeg tomorrow for 3 days so I hope I can cope ok. I'm sure I will....with God's help I will.

Also, thank you Tracy for letting me try your amazing potato salad!! It is definitely my new favorite...I'll have to make it for my guests sometime!

Highs and Lows

Mood swings - another very hard thing to deal with this week. I am back on medication now...not the same stuff I just went off of, but a different kind that helps balance emotional highs and lows. I can barely cope with it day to day. This week in particular has been hard. Going back to work has been a challenge and I don't adapt well to change - good or bad - at the best of times. I also have to consider the hormonal changes I'm still going through PLUS the side effects of just being off the previous medication. Yesterday I would cry one minute and laugh the next. It was like that on and off all day. This morning I woke up for work with eye balls that looked like Garfield's....and the stinging!!...Today I felt like I was in the Twilight Zone and now I'm glad to be back home. At least I can zone out here instead of puting on a front around everyone. I just can't wait for all of this to be over with. I hate walking around in a daze all the time and feeling exhausted and 'out of it'. Then I have to add a baby to it all. no wonder I'm going insane.

VERTIGO

Studies have shown about 40% of people in the United States experience vertigo at least once during their lifetime. Prevalence is slightly higher in women and increases with age. Vertigo usually occurs as a result of a disorder in the vestibular system (i.e., structures of the inner ear, the vestibular nerve, brainstem, and cerebellum). The vestibular system is responsible for integrating sensory stimuli and movement and for keeping objects in visual focus as the body moves.

"Hello Hello - I'm at a place called vertigo" are U2's lyrics to their song....replaying in my mind since I found out this is the weird and unpleasant dizziness I'm going through. I've been experiencing vertigo since coming off of my medication a couple of weeks ago. According to Wayne, who always does his medical research, I could go through this for up to 2 months! At first I thought it was lack of sleep. We've been suspecting Sam is going through a growth spurt, as I've been up with her several times in the night since last week. Even after a day of good meals, she still wants to nurse when I get her out of the crib. On top of it I have to get up for work and then I come home to take care of her and household chores (....ok I'm not complaining here...this is everyday life for people), but when you have vertigo all day it's quite disrupting and even a little scary when you don't know why or what it is your feeling. I'll have to talk to the doctor today at my appointment and see what needs to be done. Sam also has an appointment today for her first year vaccines...I'm sure she'll sleep that experience off this afternoon!
Tomorrow is back to work, this time for the whole course of the day. It's not so bad - it gets me out, I see our regular clients who welcome me back, it's a great feeling! Plus I can have grown up conversation. HA!
How do you like the blog update by the way? I'm just getting used to this HTML stuff. I got the idea from Beth whom I do not know, just someone dropping in and commented. I visited her site and it's all jazzed up and she sounds like we have a few things in common! Thanks Beth, I'll drop by again sometime!

More Steps

Sam has been taking more steps in the past few days...I have counted 10 steps as she walks towards me. She's very excited when she realizes what she's done and even laughs and claps to herself in HUGE praise! She's so adorable!

More Tiny Steps

Today Sam stood up in front of Max and took 3 tiny steps towards him!! Can't get her to do it again but it will happen.

...and the Oscar goes to....

Reese Witherspoon, for Walk The Line, won the Oscar for Best Actress! WOO HOO!!!

Other than that, we were quite disappointed with Oscar night. I've only seen Brokeback Mountain so I didn't have anything to compare it to....but with all the ratings and raves it got, I'm surprised Heath Ledger didn't walk away with the Oscar for Best Actor. His performance was phenomenal! Instead it was given to Philip Seymour Hoffman, for Capote. Crash also won Best Picture which I was also shocked about, as I figured it would be Brokeback Mountain. SO how am I supposed to say that when I haven't seen these other films?? Of course I will have watch them to see if they deserved these awards. Anyway, congratulations Tracy beating my votes on our Oscar Ballots, with 11 points!! I cower to the corner with a measly little 6 - oh well that's what you get for watching only one film in the year. I was lucky to have got away from home to see it with Laura....we both LOVED it!!! Now I must see Reese's winning performance!!

First Step!

For the past couple of days Sam has been standing up in the middle of the room from a sitting position all on her own. Then she slowly and carefully lowers herself back to the floor. Today she did it again but took one full step before lowering back to the floor! This all happened in the kitchen and I didn't have my camera on hand. I picked it up ASAP to catch the moment again....

Mystic

This is one of my best friends Laura...aka Mystic, I call her. We met just how Tracy and I met, through a group of wonderful friends online we called The Oprah Kick Butt Sistas. It was a group of us Ottawa girls who met in Oprah's chat room and formed our own group working together to "live our best lives".
Anyway Laura specializes in Reiki and Flower Essence therapy and also provides thorough Reiki training out of her home. She had the amazing and rare opportunity back in 2003 to travel to Glastonbury/Stonehenge, England where she became certified as a Usui Reiki Master at Stonehenge with world-renowned Reiki Master, William Lee Rand. She's come so far in this exciting journey, I had to introduce you to her. Please feel free to visit her website http://www.oceanholistic.com/ . She'll always be a friend I'm blessed to have had the chance to become close to!

Baby Proofing = Redecorating

Since forever, one of my favorite past times is decorating my home. I'm constantly 'reinventing' a room in hopes to match it with something I've seen in a magazine or the Home and Garden channel. When it comes to baby proofing, I've been having a lot of fun with it. We've had to put our glass coffee and end tables away and replace it with my most favorite idea for a kid-friendly and modern piece - a faux leather upholstered ottoman. Go to Walmart PEOPLE!!! They have two different kinds...and I'm picking up the other kind with storage...perfect for her toys! The experts say everyone needs ONE black piece for their livingroom. I couldn't resist buying more black when I saw a room display at Loblaws. I ended up buying a shelf tower and matching end table. This has really completed the look to my room. With every purchase I'm inspired to add something else. Now I'm looking for the perfect picture for the wall. Right now splashes of teal are really the look - I absolutely LOVE it!! I'm looking for a picture of a turquoise seascape and a few teal accents for my shelf. Pier 1 is the place for these finds. One of my best friends Laura has told me about www.art.com . Check it out, it's the coolest site with many options to complete your picture! Thanks 'Mystic', you always know how to help me out!

Seperation Anxiety and Oscar Night!!

Today I think I felt the seperation anxiety more than I expected Sam to. Apparently she was peachy kean staying at home with daddy. Might I add that he did a wonderful job!!! Here I am at work, on only 2 - 3 hours sleep, feeling like it's my first day on the job literally so I've forgotten almost everything....and all I could think of was calling Wayne to see how Sam was. I waited until at least 9:30am...lol...and all was well in the Cassidy household. EXCEPT for poor Wayne who worships his Tim Hortons coffee first thing and makes it a daily routine to head out instead of making it at home in our own coffee maker. I had the baby seat in my car so this made it impossible for Wayne to leave the house. He also couldn't find where I keep my coffee (where else but our canisters on the counter??). He's also absolutely grossed right out by dirty diapers, which he had to change once.....and watch endless amounts of Baby Einstein. When I made my first phone call to him, he informed me about the massive therapy he's going to need after this. HA HA welcome to my world. But he had fun dancing with her to her CD's and welcomed granny at the door with a cup of tea for a visit. Nice day! I was so excited to see Sam when I got home....I couldn't leave fast enough from work!

Tomorrow is Oscar night....I'm so excited! now THIS is MY superbowl PEOPLE!! I have decided this year with my pal Tracy that we're going to enjoy this night together in our jammies and loads of treats to munch on. Trace also downloaded ballots for us to fill out straight from the Oscar website. Wayne said we should dress Sam up for the occasion...not a bad idea!! Oh I can't wait until she's older and I can put makeup on her..haha!

Also my cousin Kathy's 26 year old brother Tim is fighting hard in Calgary in the neurological unit at the Foothills Hospital. He has a deadly brain infection called Encephalitis. He is extremely sick, and they are praying that he can pull through it. Please pray for him, thank you so very much. I pray God sees them all through this terrifying time!!

Have a good weekend, all!
Heidi xoxo

Last Day

Well tomorrow is the day. I'm back to work - EEEEEEEEK! I'm so uneasy for some unknown reason. Perhaps the thought that being at home for a whole year with my newborn has already come and gone. She's getting older and it happened so fast. I don't know why I'm nervous about leaving Sam. Guess I know her routine more than anyone. But I'm only gone for a few hours, I can just think of it as leaving her with Wayne to run a few errands and I'll be back....as I've always done. Wayne's mom has agreed to babysit her on Wednesday mornings too....I know Sam will really enjoy that! And Gran too! I guess I'll just have to get used to waking up extra early to get out the door in time. I'm scared she'll want to feed or something and I can't be there. I'm not sure what it is - ah! All will be well I'm sure. At least I get to hang out with grown ups again. Oh no! And talk about babies...NO WAY can't do that. I will not talk endlessly about Sam. It's just the thing I didn't want to fall into, as I've seen other moms do.

Well I must head off to the dentist to have my retainers adjusted. I cannot wait until I don't have to wear these anymore! It's been almost 2 years since I had the braces taken off.

Lent and Overall Well-Being

The beginning of Lent for most has started. I haven't ever observed Lent, but there's no time like the present. I grew up in a small town Christian community in Alberta, but my immediate family never went to church, nor were we practicing Christians; although we lived well and had other influences like my dear grandparents - both of whom were very seriously committed and strong traditional Lutherans. My best friend across the alley from me came from a strong Christian family and I was always surrounded by other good Christian kids in my school. We also started each class with The Lord's Prayer, whereas now you'd never see that in our politically correct world. As the years went on, my dad became a born-again Christian and my sister Kristin has found God in her life. Today I continue to meet people of Christian faith, lately through my my dearest friend Tracy. Over the years I've always searched for ways to cope through trying times by turning to God and practicing my faith by trust, prayer and/or reading daily devotional. Thanks to Tracy I can read a Devotional book she bought for me this past Christmas....What a wonderful positive influence she's always been in my life! Yesterday she blogged about Lent and the traditions she follows (http://spaces.msn.com/tracysgroovystudio/)
She's decided to give up fast food, whereas I've decided I will give up caffeine and also add something good for the next 40 days. I'm keeping a daily journal about the work God is doing in my life. I think this is not only a good idea ONLY until Easter, but to also recognize it in our daily lives in order to keep our faith strong and positive. I guess you can say it's another way to count our blessings. I had a journal once, specifically made for counting blessings. Each page had a day of the year with a list for 5 blessings to jot down. I will try and pick one up at Chapters tomorrow.

Which brings me to what a wonderful day today is. Thanks to my husband who bought me a 90 minute massage for my birthday, I got to be in total bliss today! It empowered me to live in the moment and relax - even driving home, I was so amazed at how it inspired me to change my attitude in life. (I can take this as my journal entry for today as God working in my life.) It's also inspired me to take action to eat healthier and exercise, something that's been on my mind these days anyway. Body, mind and spirit. I've also gone off of my anxiety medication, as I'd like to be drug free and handle things naturally. We'll see how this works, as it can still be touch and go hormonally.

Thank God for my family and another day.

Love Heidi